*warning: long, boring and generally pointless post ahead*
i am one of those people whose best side is the virtual side. i am much more at ease when hiding behind the safety of my laptop screen. with real life, i tend to struggle a lot more, with the sort of awkward shyness which many mistake for arrogance (i remember mentioning this somewhere on this blog somewhere before). i don't mind this much, cause people who still make the effort to know and befriend me are very, very precious, but it is a contrast to my earlier talktative, garrulous self. now, that avatar is rather rare, and some of my old friends have bluntly called me "boring, now". oh well *shrugs*
so, what really was i trying to tell you? am not much of a people person. right.
so, staying in a PG was an adventure of sorts. with two roomies who were both much older than me. one of them had a physical handicap which made her gait slightly lopsided. and another was a quietish person, who minded her own business and worked long hours. i quite liked the latter. the former, oh well!
it IS rather trying to be woken up almost every day by the snarls of a roomie. nothing pleased her. the food was inedible, and often suspected of being "impure", by which i suppose she meant non-veg (i am not saying it was michelin star rated cooking. but it was okay. and no PG owner would give you non-veg without taking extra money for the same! :P). there was a daily squabble over who'd go take a bath first. i usually wound up being the last one (since i was not being paid for the internship, the in/out times were a lot relaxed for me) and having to do with a bucket of water, after which the taps inevitably ran dry. she belittled my stint there, whatever i was learning with an intolerable been-there-done-that-what's-the-big-deal attitude, and was incredulous to know that i got a certificate for the time i spent in lab (well, nobody was paying me like you, darling), called people who loved dance as "nachaniya"s, which was a remarkably tactful thing to say to someone who can't imagine life without dance, and has completed a graduation in the same :) and was generally obnoxious. after a while i took to long walks till dinnertime, and post return, kept my headphones firmly plugged in my ears to shut out her talk about how her boss was out to "get her". i owe peace to my headphones. otherwise, we really might've had One Big Battle.
but what really got me fuming was a conversation we had once, post dinner.
she was going to start a new series of "vrats"- every thursday, she had to wear yellow, have yellow food, go tie something at the temple and pray (if i may add, to the accompaniment of LOUD bhajans playing on her phone). the family pandit had advised her to carry out for a few weeks (i forget how many) and couriered her the "pooja ka samaan" (there's a pun here that only i can understand, so, haha) i do not belong to a religious family, and was mystified about the point of this colour coded fast. so i asked her, whatever for do you have to act all jaundiced every week? she gave a rather long and involved reply, but the upshot was- to catch a man.
ah, right. pity it never occured to me.
that started off an animated discussion about the different fasts and all the miracles they bring about. i was bored and was about to leave when she suddenly asked why i didn't have a brother? um, isn't that a question for my parents. and how does it matter? no, she just wondered why they never tried?
TRIED? oh, bite me.
then she told me all about how wise the pandit was. when she was born, he checked her head and predicted that the next baby would be a boy. it was. and it was also a miscarriage. what a shame he couldn't predict that. he ALSO told her the Quick Sex Determination Test- if the baby's giving trouble in utero, it's probably a girl. she wound up by telling me that she devoutly hoped to never have daughters. i wasn't surprised. who wants trouble right from the beginning?
it isn't like i haven't come across superstitions before. or discrimination. but it always amazes me to see WOMEN acting like this. i could excuse the bias in a child/uneducated person. but she has a clutch of degrees. all in BIOLOGY, no less. the same subject taught me how the gender of a foetus is determined, way back in class nine. i don't remember head examination or a pandit as a part of that lesson.
it scares me- this mindlessness in the name of religion. what's the point of education if the basic mindset remains of the nineteenth century? thank goodness i grew up in the family i did.
speaking of religion, something rather funny happened while i was returning from chandigarh to delhi to visit my sister before coming to kolkata. it was quite a job lifting two insanely heavy suitcases, backpack, a laptop bag, and myself (i took a solemn oath when i had to repeat the entire process in reverse at the delhi station, as my brother-in-law was late- i am travelling light in the future! it was less clothes vis-a-vis a broken back :P) into the compartment, and making sure i didn't break any limbs in the process. after finally managing to stow everything away, i got my music player out. my co-passenger was an elderly Sikh man, and the window seat was empty. the next hour was divided between having coffee, answering anxious calls (mostly about the safety of the damn luggage than me. hmph) and listening to music. which is when i realized that Old Man was staring at me. intently.
this is the transcript of our conversation
OM: what are you doing, beti?
me: i just finished with graduation uncleji. i'd start with my MSc soon.
OM: you studied in english medium?
me(slightly startled): yes. why?
OM: can you please translate something fom hindi to english for me?
me: yes, sure.
OM: aam ke aam gutliyon ke daam
me: !
OM: nahin hoga tumse?
me(is it a joke? is it a trick question? why is he bugging me?): uncle, yeh to muhavra hai. direct translation karne ka fayda nahin.
OM: itna bhi nahin ho paaya. agar tum padhai aur ram naam par dhyaan deti, gaane sunne ke jagah, to tumhari zindagi me sudhaar aa jata.
me: !!!
he also gave me this interesting tidbit- vishwaas in hindi is the combination of two words. in two different languages. vish meaning poison. waas, meaning wash in english. did you know this is a potent word to "wash away all the poison in us using dharma"? did you? yes, you can thank me for this trivia.
by the time he started off a general lecture on the degenerate modern generation, the window seat passenger had come. she was a pleasant woman who was a mother to two young boys, and she had done her PhD on folk arts in rajasthan. we kept up a spirited and LOUD conversation throughout the journey :)
people, i tell you!
PS: i found this post slightly spiteful, especially when i think of the last day when my roomie gave me a pretty birthday gift and tried to laugh away the tremor in her voice when she said she couldn't find someone who'd marry her. is it possible that her handicap made her so bitter? if that is so, it is very sad. but my grouse about superstitions remains.
PPS: since there's no telling when am going to write again (soon, i hope), i am going to pondicherry university to do my MSc in Ecology and Environmental Science. i am looking forward to the experience :) though am unable to figure out whether it's the course or the beach or the fact that now i can finally learn french properly, that has gotten me all excited :D
also, i turned a green old twenty one late last month. wish me. NOW! :P
